The forecast is calling for baby showers. And let me tell you. When it rains babies, it pours. Seems like the only person around me that is not pregnant is me, and this would be seemingly insignificant, if it werent for the law of attraction. Thanks to all my lovely fertile friends, now my clock is ticking. I want a baby, and cant decern if it is merely to fit in, or if my virgo intestines are overly active creating gas and a cute little pooch. Now I have one more monumental thing to add to the list of "wants", right after a UFO landing ( am I the only one, who would LOVE to see this?) I am a normal, lesbian, psychic who blogs about the idiosyncronicitics of dating and now I want a bun in the oven??? I assure you, this is not a publicity scheme to increase my readership. Now, I wonder if I am trying to trick the universe into making myself unavailable, and then attract available people? The "right person" sticks to me about as well, as anything sticks to a frying pan after using Pam Spray. So now I have to add further complications to my already complicated dating profile, by wanting a baby right away.
To all straight men out there... Does this sound vagely familiar? You meet a woman, who in her femanist ways, is so intuitive that she knows when you lied to watch football with your buds..and wont stop nagging you about having a baby. I have turned into my worst nightmare. That is me! A single straight woman who's time is running out!
Off to buy almond milk, free range eggs, gluten free bread and sperm.
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